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my late wife and i took our developmentally delayed daughter, Elisa to The Option Institute.
They had done some amazing work with autistic kids
and thought Elisa is not autistic, she is on the spectrum
and we wanted t see what they would suggest
for how we could best be with her.
that story is a different post
but there was one thing they noticed that changed my life.

they noticed, that i was a sucker for crying.
the moment our daughter started to cry, my heart melted
and i gave in to anything she wanted.
it happened over and over again
and when they called it to my attention, i saw it clearly.

so they asked me to record 15 minutes
of my favourite piece of music
and 15 minutes of elisa crying
and told me to listen with headphones on
to the full 30 minutes as least 3X a day
and then said to me,
when you get the same amount of pleasure from elisa crying
as you do from your favourite piece of music,
you can stop doing the exercise.

moments are just moments, sounds are just sounds,
feelings are just feelings
none of these have meaning
except for the meaning we give them.

is the mantra i am trying on now
to see if i really believe,
everyone has the right to live theirs lives just as they see fit;
i am on the journey of love and acceptance
doing my best to love and accept people right where they are.

with people i don’t know it is easy.
with those closest to me, i have a much harder time.
one step at a time, i continue to move forward
making, making one day made.

how are you in this adventure?
please comment below.

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