ANOTHER VERY VULNERABLE SHARE
it is so nice when suddenly out of the blue
I receive confirmation for the things I feel.
i have been pretty forthcoming
sharing my vulnerability with people
about feeling that there is a new way for me to be in the world
i have become disillusioned
with the merchant like mentality of our interactions.
we seem to be endlessly engaged in selling ourselves
or being sold services by others.
the process, which i for many years engaged in too
has left me feeling empty.
for the last year, i have been feeling a change within me.
i have been sitting, meditating, praying, listening,
and practicing patience
and in the past i have not been a very patient person.
i have been frustrated, scared, called crazy,
lectured to, told by others what to do;
i have more heads shaken at me, fingers pointed at me
and opinions shade with me than ever before in my life.
and, i have felt more grace, more love of god, more content;
i have felt my walls dropping and my sensitivity rising;
i have felt the bliss of surrender
and the sacredness of living in the now.
i am feeling more, fighting less, loving more, rationalising less
serving more, worrying about what you think less,
i have been more peaceful and less stressed,
i have spoken less and been quiet more
and in the quiet i am feeling a resurgence of my soul
on my connection to who i really am.
i feel more trust,
guided by an inner voice that sometimes scares me
not because i am afraid to do what it says
but rather because i do not know how to do it.
i have spent hours sitting going deep inside
rather than hunting and searching for people to help.
my mantra has been to be like a flower
that opens it petals to release an aroma
that is so intoxicating that any one who passes by it
can do nothing else but stop a moment to smell it.
over these last days, i have started to receive confirmation
that solutions come when i listen to my soul.
i have known this for decades,
but in my desire to take care of my self and my family,
i have forgotten to listen to the one who takes care of me.
thank you being patient with me
and for holding the space for me to trust again
to keep going in the direction of my inner truth
to know there is a way we can work together
where each of us become a part of our decision to do so.
it takes trust, lots of trust
and it feels so right, so beautiful, so intoxicating
to do business in this way.
if anyone is interested to further this conversation,
please reach out to me and contact me.
let talk, work, love soul to soul.
we have work to do. lets do it together.